Sunday, October 17, 2004

"I am... the most beautiful boogeyman..." -- Mos Def ..

I got to tell you about yesterday. It was a clear demonstration that the Creator will work out. One just has to be patient and keep the faith. I was broke this weekend. Matter of fact, my bank account has a negative balance. I cancelled some meetings and performances because i had no money for gas. I did have a gig this weekend. The problem was that the person who booked it, did not pay the final balance. We could not get a hold of this person since they were from out of town AND their cell phone was disconnected. So my boss wanted us to risk it and show up.

I arrived the at the typical time (one hour before the actual function). OUr customer was not there. The function began and i had everything going well. The manager of the spot approached me and asked if could stay until 1:30am. i said as long as she was paying me. I was elated. I was going to walk away with money in my pocket!

The client finally arrived (an hour after the function started, so i was sweating bullets... if she did not have the payment in cash, i was to pack up and leave as broke as i was when i came in). Everything was smooth. It was a high school reunion. There was not alot of people there. When the buffet table opened, i did not have to call each table up, i just said "everybody help yourselves..."

Yesterday, my skills as a Dj was surely tested. I played everything and they did not dance. What saved me were the people who paid to get in (the manager usually charges folks to come into the resturant and opens up a dance floor with a DJ -- Tonight, they had me as their motivator). Those folks started to arrive at around 10:30pm. They heard the music.

I did not know that my speakers could kick like that. I ran outside to get something out of my van and i was like "dag, they can hear it on the highway." This brought more customers in. A small squad from NYC came through. It was three brothers and three sisters. They danced to everything i played. They were getting open. I just played for them. I went old school on them with the hip hop and R&B . they were getting real live. Then i went on some old school reggae. It was a wrap. NExt thing I know the dance floor was packed.

This is where it got funny. ONe of the NYC sisters was really getting it on. She was trying to dance with everyone. Even the heads that were there for the reunion. She was feeling up on dudes and letting them grab her ass. I wondered if she was an off duty stripper. She kept putting her guns up everytime i played a song she liked. So i started catering to her. It was funny to see the reactions of some of the dudes there. All these thug-hang-on-the-wall-non-dancing cats did not know what to do.

I ran into someone I used to work with. It was good to see her, i just could not remember her name. So throughout most of the evening she sent signals to tell me i was doing well. This is where it got funny. One of the '94 classmates (from the reunion), was peeping me. She came in with some dude. She kept smiling and throwing google eyes at me. What made it worse was that my girl from my old job sat in the table behind her. So when i looked at my old work buddy and we cracked jokes via sign language and musical tastes, the sister who came to the reunion thought i was flirting with her. I did not peep this until she finally got up to dance and just stayed in front of my set dancing. She continued to flirt. I ignored her most of the time and made sure i stopped looking in her direction. But she danced the whole night in front of my set. What saved me was the NYC girls.

Then Ms. Mos Def came in with her crew. I call her that because she looked like Mos Def. She really did. At first, I thought itwas a dude. But the neck was straight and her hands were feminine. and her legs were not diesel like those transvestites be. SHe was just plain oogly.
She kept making google eyes at me too. She kept dancing and urging me to join her by doing that finger thing that women do when they want you go to come over. I had to laugh but held it. I acted like i dropped something and ducked under my set.

It was too funny.

Then these real hardcore cats came in. I happened to know like two of them. one of them just got out so they asked me to get crunk. I played some Lil' Jon stuff, they went bananas. All the ladies went nuts, too. It reminded me of Chris Rock when he said that women listen to the most ignorant, misogynistic crap out there. Crunk music is nothing but that. But they danced. This one voluptuous sister wore an outfit that hid nothing. Everyone was all over her. She fought them off as hard as she could. I called security for her. These bouncers did not look like bouncers at all. They were ugly, however, and that was enough for me. Few heads gave them problems. One of them looked like he was sewn together. The other brother looked like a cross between that white cat from Blade II that Wesley Snipes cut in half and the lead rapper from the Sugarhill Gang. He even had a white stripe in his hair. So he looked like a leftover from last year's Halloween. I still shiver just thinking about them.

When I started to just play reggae, things got real interesting. This one dude came in with this very beautiful sister. They were together because they were holding hands. All eyes just zoomed in. Dude was very short, so immediately i know he had a complex. He was scoping everyone like he was going to blow us all up on some Al Qaeda ish. He even gave me the evil eye. But like a dummy, he leaves to go to the bigger bar upfront.
And dudes fly in for the kill....

The ill thing was that she was not fronting at all. She rub a dubbed with whomever came over to ask her to dance. And there is rub a dubbing and then there is dry humping. YOu can rub a dub to reggae without touching. BUt she was dry humping. This one dude from the high school reunion was really feeling her. They danced about 4 songs. I knew that her man would be back soon, so I was left with a decision. I could either keep the reggae music going and let her man walk in and get real stupid. Or i can switch to something that will get mostly everyone on the dance floor.

I chose option A. I figured that dude was dumb to even be with a girl like that who he probably had a good idea that she did stuff like this. FOr that, he should be in jail. If the other guy got shot, he deserved it for trying to push up on someone's girl. I was also ego tripping. For a Dj, to keep the dance floor full is esctasy. We love it. We live for it. When that doesn't happen, its like my wife left me or something. i am really hurt. So keeping it live is one of the main reasons i Dj.

So i kept playing Reggae. Next thing I know, dude returns with a vengeance. He starts arguing with the cat who violated. Both argued back and forth and his girl just kept dancing like nothing happened. I called Security again ( I had like a messenger at the bar), and the two ugloids showed up to break it up.

I did not turn off the music either. I just kept playing. 1:30am came faster than i thought. The crowd gave me props. As i was loading up, heads came up and congratulated me. They advised that i should play at a club. I thanked them. I played mostly old school and they were feeling it. See, young folks know the deal, ya'll...

I drove home with money in my pocket, a future business connect, and in a happy mood.

--------------------

I watched In America with my family. I heard some good stories about this movie. Afeni reviewed it on her site. I cried at the end. My wife missed the ending and when i told her, i cried again. Its a good bittersweet ending. I loved it. check it out.

Djimon Hounsou played it in. He really held it down. He really showed much emotion. Its good to see a brother who is not afraid to show his feelings. He cried alot in this movie. He character, Mateo, was very passionate. He was an artist who lost his family. At night he would cry out and just yell. His character was touching.

He said one thing that stayed in my head "I am in love with everything that lives..."

The movie reminds me of my family. We don't have much, but we have each other. My wife and I live in a wonderful fairy tale of love. She, the beautiful African queen everyone worships. Everything she touches turns to gold. Me, the happy go lucky B-boy warrior who everyone sees as a hero. Our children, beautiful and intelligent and wonderful. They fill everyone's day with sunshine. We are always broke however and always winging it. Just like the couple in the movie. BUt we have each other. The husband however takes it for granted. But its not that he cheats on his wife or anything, he just stops showing emotion. his youngest daughter believes he is an imposter. Its bugged. In the end, just like in our life, things work out for the best.








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